Thanks for reading my columns! A place for pithy observations that have been done better elsewhere. History repeats itself. Human nature doesn’t change. Which is why we grapple with the same problems that have haunted civilization since the dawn of time. Plato predicted it. Cicero predicted it. Orwell predicted it. I’m not surprised.
There’s nothing I can say that the above haven’t said better, so let’s turn to popular entertainment. We can always gaze into the abyss later. I have three rules when writing a story.
One. Entertain. Well duh. You’d think that would be obvious, but from the river of trash emanating from formerly respectable industries, including film, television, novels and comics, you might conclude that many of these creators have lost sight of their mission. My goal is to grab the reader by the throat on the first page and immerse xim in the narrative so deeply that xe will become violent if anything interrupts xis journey through the story
Two. Show don’t tell. I covered this in my last column.
Three. Be original. We’re all unique, and those of us who weave tales for a living bring our experience and impressions with us. That’s what makes fiction compelling. Over a million novels a year are published in this country. Many of them are self-published. Some are great. Many are good. Most are crap. Theodore Sturgeon was a science fiction writer. Sturgeon’s law is simple. Eighty per cent of everything is crap. Those of you chanel surfing through 185 streaming services know this to be true. The great director Sam Fuller (Pick Up On South Steet, The Big Red One, Merrill’s Marauders) said, "If a story doesn't give you a hard-on in the first couple of scenes, throw it in the goddamned garbage." He was on to something. This doesn’t mean your passion will automatically translate into a wide audience, but it brings up an important principle:
A writer must entertain xerself before xe can entertain others.
I’m a firm believer in outlines. I start by making notes in a legal pad. When I reach critical mass, in which the story reveals itself to me, I write a detailed outline. Not super detailed. But detailed enough. Invariably, I will veer away from that outline as I get into the story. How does this happen? Any accomplished writer knows that when you create a three dimensional character, that character will turn around and tell you what happens next. A writer must surprise xerself before xe can surprise others. Enough with the pronouns. I’m defaulting to outmoded oppressions. In researching a story, I often learn things that effect the story. I recently wrote a YA novel called Sea Wolves, about a philanthropic organization that teaches boys to be men by teaching them to sail. The story called for a returning Vietnam veteran to smuggle a rare gem into the country. I researched rare gems in Vietnam and learned that Vietnam is a source of ruby, sapphire, spinel, tourma- line, peridot, garnet, aquamarine, green orthoclase, topaz, zircon, quartz, and pearls. I went with sapphire. I learned about the French plantations where locals worked as slaves. This affected the story.
All writers need a copy of Strunk and White’s Elements of Style. This slim, witty book is over seventy years old. There are thousands of how to write books. I have several that are so awful, I’m thinking of holding an auction. Elements of Style will help you find your style. We no longer write as they did in the nineteenth century. Except for those who write Sherlock Holmes stories. A modern audience prefers a more direct, cinematic approach. My goal is to transmit maximum impact with the least amount of words. I write violent thrillers, horror, and Florida Man. I’m all over the place! But my style remains the same. Michael Chabon (The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay) is the opposite. In his novel Telegraph Avenue, there is a five thousand word chapter about a bird escaping its cage. It’s all one sentence. It never flags. That’s what you can do with words when you know what you’re doing. You’ll also learn new words. If you want to learn new words, read Chabon or Anthony Burgess (A Clockwork Orange.)
I wish I could get up and write two thousand words by noon like some of my friends. Instead, I’m writing this column! What’s wrong with me? Thank you for reading.
STRUNK & WHITE!!
Holy Cow I need to go buy a copy now. I have a full set of Funk & Wagnalls in the room, ao having a copy next to it would allow me to have Funk & Strunk on the same shelf.
Thank you for the insights, Mike! 💖